Aita for causing my siblings to lose massive amounts of money After he passed his sister/executor asked if I would give money to his parents since he left me everything and them nothing - I said no. But he can be shit on and discarded like he's nothing. We had very little money and were on food stamps on and off, and whenever my father had extra money he spent it on b*oze. Now that my dad has passed I have inherited everything from him and learned that my father owned alot more properties and had alot more money then I could have ever imagine. My Dad easily remembered the book report and even a sentence he had helped me tweak. Husband had an affair, had a kid. I went to my bank and they helped me get a lawyer, an accountan, and they have set me up with a financial planner. I (33M) have NC with my parents (72M retired and 65F about to retire) and siblings for about 1. They’ve begun harassing my husband and my SIL. Last week she paid me my 30 dollars back she needed and two days later asked me for 20 more dollars to which I responded I did not have it. Seven months ago, we got new neighbors. Overall I think the cost of everything put together was about $1500 (I had some expensive miniatures my mom had given to my brother that I took back along with my dungeons and dragons stuff). Now, I would've been perfectly fine helping them out since they have helped me so many times before. I have NEVER spoken to my siblings in my life. But I’m not pregnant i carry around the fibroids and water retention because of them. If I tell him, I will be betraying my other sons trust because I told him that it is his decision when to tell Connor. Where do I even begin. I still would have been excited for her. My wife and I were happy beyond words. My mom and sister have both been posting about how hard it is to be at Disneyland with two little ones. Sometimes I feel like my actions are justified while at other times I So, I (26M) grew up in what I thought was a typical family. Maybe due to my bias, I have no sympathy for the 16 year old. If OP had allowed that/gone with it there’s plenty of long term consequences that could come up, like Maddie feeling unable to stand up for herself to her cousins, honestly to more than just her cousins, and seeing OP as someone who will enable The action I took that should be judged is refusing to lend my sister money, as well as showing off my money and lifestyle too much 2) This could make me the AH if I was wrong and cruel to not help out my sister, and if I handled everything wrong. i didn’t have any previous knowledge I was even in the will. They ended up trying to get me to give them the money I made selling my car so they wouldn't lose the house. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I turned down the inheritence of our childhood home for my siblings by not wanting to work together with them, which could lead to no inheritence in the future (if my dad I might be the asshole for causing my coworker to lose out on $4,000. 1: Taking the car back, thus causing my sister to lose her job. I got drunk with my cousins and my mom was overwhelmed by her needy relatives. My sister (34F) and her husband (36M) just got married 3 months ago. 2K votes, 4K comments. I know im not a perfect kid. I'm refusing to help my stepkids get any money for college because I'm not the reason they were cut out of the will. I let it rot. I worked Whenever I protested this my mom would threaten to charge me $2000 a month for renting my room and said if I tried to move out before I was 18 she’d have me charged as a runaway. My partner left me an important amount of money when he passed and left nothing to his parents. he didn’t have to, but he did. I definitely mouth off sometimes and deserve to be yelled at, and by all means I'm not saying my parents are toxic or abusive. My great grandma hated my dad (for good reason tbh) so before she died she asked my mom when she thought she'd leave my dad. My parents have split their will so that the grandchildren get some money each (I have no idea how much, it could be the same as me and my siblings are getting), and the rest is equally split between me and my siblings. My SIL (married to my brother) told me I was an asshole for throwing half in their faces and cutting them from my wedding like we haven't been siblings our whole lives. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I chose to take in my biological sisters who I share both parents with, with my brothers help am raising them because of an unstable life with our dad. But my mom found out I had money for some special treats for my little brother and sister. And, you don't talk to people that way. At the time my little brother Austin was 2, and she was pregnant with my sister Alyssa. Dad accused me of turning my siblings against them. My dad worked little, my mom actually worked like a horse but my dad would blow through all the money. My sister had paid me some money so me doing this essentially means she's out of that cash and her job and a car. My aunt only lives a 45min walk away so it won't be too bad and she will drive me there in a rush if needed. As people were leaving, my brother asked if my nephew could take home one of my 2 year old son’s toy trucks. I waited until my mom had gone to work and my siblings were at school before taking my electronics along with some smaller things I had bought that my siblings ended up with. If they get upset with him getting the money he contributed to the AITA for causing my siblings to lose massive amounts of money when they need it most? This is a messy situation all around. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I might be the AH for not helping my mom when we're struggling for money rn, she's really worried about us and she doesn't use her money to buy nice things for her or I (17F) have a college fund started by my grandparents (maternal and paternal) with some of the money coming from my parents. Guy of course is thankful and defends me. About five years ago, they went In a recent post on Reddit’s r/AITAH forum, a user named OwnBet5510 shared a deeply personal dilemma involving their estranged sibling, inheritance, and family dynamics. I couldn’t help also dropping the fact that I am covering the remaining $190, to which they started complaining wasn’t fair. Long story short, my online shop blew up & made well over six figures my first year. When my siblings (I was a boring nerd in highschool) started smoking weed, his one rule was not in the house- he wouldn't forbid it because hell, if he could he would be joining in- because he had responsibilities. Sometimes I feel like my actions are justified while at other times I AITA for causing my siblings to lose massive amounts of money when they need it most? This is a messy situation all around. I work hard for my money and I also don’t have a very high paying job. He may be able to afford the loss but his siblings should care enough that he gets his money back and not take the loss. My parents recently asked about my job and education and were not happy when I said I'm a nanny and have my masters in special education. The money is enough where even if I pay for college and buy a house I would have money left. I've been in contact with my siblings, though. I think it's because I'm the oldest my parents think I need less attention which is true compared to my siblings. Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! I (F) just had my 21st birthday in which I invited my boyfriend (Jake), my best friend (Liam), & other close friends (Ava & Bri). This story involves Jake, Ava, & Bri (all fake names). 51K Likes, 1620 Comments. It sounds like it really sucks. My parents were very mad at me for losing my passport. I remember one thread, a while back. My brother is a freelancer, so more often than I like, he is struggling. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I feel like I really WAS being to touchy and overreactive over the allergy, and possibly too rough with his sister when I could have just sat down and talked to her Unbeknownst to me my grandmother had it in her will that any money owed by grandkids to her at the time of her death was forfeit from inheritance to the parent of that grandkid. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I told my friend I saw our other friend and her brother in a compromising position even though I knew it would upset my friend and would most likely result in her asking Yup, and apparently those strings are allow Nate and the kids to walk all over OP and Maddie along with treating them like shit. We don’t get much financial aid as a result of my parents’ income and savings. Last month, we were made aware of videos the boy was making of my son and sending them to children from his school. I didn't even take my husband because I wanted it to AITA for causing my husband to miss his trip by not packing his bag He came home and lost it saying I cost him his business trip which supposed to earn him money and made him look unreliable/unprofessional and compromised his I 16F am currently living with my step father and mother, my mother is planning to take me on a massive holiday for my graduation gift. So I can see how I could be the ass here. When he was alive he explained to me that this was his intention, and that his parents did not need the money. My son was also extremely happy to finally have a friend his own age. My siblings feel like they are entitled to some of the inheritance and have told me if I don't give them any they'll stop talking to me and that I'm becoming like my dad. My carer has a signed and witnessed POA as my designated NOK for health reasons, but my spouse can and will This year my half sister was diagnosed with a life threatening sickness, and she has been in the hospital for the last four months. Laura came home crying the other day because Emily came back with food from her favourite restaurant and didn't give her anything or offer to share so I called my ex and told him that he needs to stop giving Emily lunch money and have her make her own lunches because she was hurting Laura. My mother weighed less and was always just as unhealthy. What I said hurt them. My mother was the fourth wife, and my sisters mother was the second wife (she was extremely abusive to her children which is why he left her. "AITA for refusing to help my parents financially after they secretly supported my 'perfect' sibling instead of me?" Growing up, I was always the “self-sufficient” one. All I’m doing for anyone and they better not call me ever because I’m not answering. The money they spent on my flight and entrance was wasted. AITA for asking about my share of inheritance, which basically challenges my mom's right to her money and assets and for causing this conflict? My grandma gifted me about 5k after moving in with her to help me start an online business I told her about. i was upset when he passed because we had always been a bit closer than him and the rest of my siblings/family. 2. Bro. 5 years now, but I have always been sending my parents money on the 1st of every month ever since I graduated college and got a job. I was so excited to help her plan her wedding and I took on most of the work since i was unemployed at the time and she's a doctor. I go on Snapchat & to my text messages & I am being sent screenshots of my siblings very publicly humiliating me & disowning me. I have two siblings with different dads and nothing ever this heinous came out of out our mouths. Same circumstances as yours. My dad married my step mom Rose when I was about 2 years old. My ex-husband has not asked to see my daughter for the past week. I increased this amount as my career progressed, so as of 2020, I was sending them both $1000 each. AITA For Causing My Coworker To Lose A 500$ TipI am currently in my senior year of college. The three Xmases I spent with that family, I bought and wrapped all the gifts, for which my then-husband took sole credit. I (f19) have an estranged grandpa more or less. My ex has custody most of the year but my daughter stays with us on on alternating school breaks and summer. Online he’s saying how I ruined his youth by trapping him with a baby. She has her own room and we give her a lot of space, and my wife is very respectful towards her. he doesn’t keep it clean and "AITA for not giving my inheritance to any of my siblings?" My dad has passed away and I have gotten all of his inheritance. Honestly, this is one of the reasons my former spouse and I haven't sought a legal divorce or separation - I have multiple chronic illnesses, and I do not want my family, and especially my mother, involved in any decisions regarding my care in dire circumstances. I know my siblings miss me like crazy and I knew they had lost dad and were scared. My mother comes to stay with me and Ry leaves the hospital, shortly after Ry leaves I started receiving texts and calls shaming me for faking cancer. I had a cavity. It might not have been my place to do so Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! Click Here For Our Rules and Click Here For Our FAQ My friend allowed my daughter and I to move in with her. My son explained that he had to skip a workday which cost him to lose money and asked my boyfriend to pay him for his time. Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! I didn’t ask for his money. They both posted that I ruined the vacation by being so thoughtless. ) my father lived modestly up until 20 some years ago, and my sisters lived with with my grandmother during most of their childhood—-but my mother tried to adopt them when they were 6; they refused wanting to stay with the grandmother. He’d borrow my bus pass and lose it. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: During a fight with my stepsiblings and half sister I exploded and told them I hope their dad dies and that they end up miserable because they deserve it for how they have Idk, I came from a family who’s been struggling with money and financially illiterate (my family never had any savings). Sounds a little selfish but is it wrong? I’m pretty sure he was gone by the time my second child was born, but at that point my bio-siblings had been ostracized from the remaining family (who were all mom’s husband’s kids) so I didn’t get unwanted information about him in incidental conversation. So I feel like maybe I'm a bit of an asshole for that. I get my hysterectomy in two months and its expected to correct issues. She thinks that in a year, we would be more financially prepared to take on the kids, which to me is guesswork. The oldest taking care of my two younger siblings and my little sister had severe autism and epilepsy and wasn't able to do anything on her own so that was a lot by itself. My brother said that he’d replace the toy if I told him where I got it. If I had talked like that to my sibling or my mother, I would have had to cut my own switch, and then probably dig my own grave. Within 5 years 2 online shops & a lot of investing in real estate & stocks I now make way more money than my parents ever made combined. My son and their son were the same age and they started hanging out. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: Refusing to let SIL use my address That isn't the worst I've seen here. Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! Click Here For Our Rules and Click Here For Our FAQ. I had it, my mom had it, my brother had it, my cousins husband had it, my husbands uncle had it, my aunt had it 3 coworkers had it and my best friend had it. When we returned, My son asked my boyfriend to pay him for "babysitting" "his kids" I admit my son doesn't have the best relationship with his stepdad or stepsiblings but My boyfriend and I were shocked by this. I feel most guilty about the upheaval it caused them and the sort of separation between us now. Which is nice, we were living in a bad area before so this can be a fresh start. It really fucked up my SIL to not be believed and then to have people think the worst. I'm also not giving them any money for it out of my own pocket because I don't have any due to financial struggles. She said 40 so she set her trust fund to be released to her fully when she turned 40 and if she died before then my siblings and I would have gotten it when we were all of age. And I gave everyone a headache by “provoking” her and causing the drama of her crying and yelling at Thanksgiving. I gave her the wad of cash, said that was all the money I had to spare on this trip and she could decide who deserved it most. The bills are mounting and my dad came to me for help because they are now in a situation where they are finding it difficult to come up with money for my half sister's treatment. Luckily, I had gotten help from my Dad (it had been assigned as homework to be done over two days), and had the bright idea to ask him to call and check. So I have some time to deal with this but my mom and her husband want me to share the money with my stepsiblings (14, 8 and 7). ) wife doesn't want to try to raise them on her own, agrees to My wife and I have two kids [also 3/13mo coincidentally]. I lost 30 pounds and am having bariatric surgery in about a month. Haha, I'm from Poland and we're the same. They’ve come to me asking if I’d be willing to share more of my inheritance to help them out. They made a comment that I'm working the same job that I've had since I was 15 and how I'll be broke forever then told me to get a real job like my brother (accountant) and sister (nurse). I also now have to fix and repair the other house, while doing this I give money to my brother when he has a hard time and life is difficult for him. But thing only got My mother has also made it clear I will only be recieving life insurance money if I were to take care of him in the past, which you knowcool, but its whatever. Darn. So I paid our rent and groceries, utilities and phone. My siblings are all well off and I am disabled and barely making ends meet on SSI. AITA?. I never liked my stepfather or his family to begin with so I hated this idea. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! I second this. I only lost 90lbs from 320-230. Also money wise I couldn't really double my budget for 2 extra people. Money was always a sore point, as my ex had embarked upon a “spiritual path” that prevented him, he said, from working full time. After my dad died, Rose left me to foster care. The fund was originally for me and my sister but my mom and sister died four years ago and my grandparents, who hold the account, chose to leave it all for me and continued paying into it. I said in my very poor Spanish that I would love to help all of them but my mom knew them better and what they needed. my grandfather bought my dad a very nice house. true. My issue is that once she passes im to be expected to essentially fill the mother role in ways im not sure im capable of and if im being honest, not sure I event want to. He died when I was 6 because of cancer. Yeah they threw a fit when I moved on my 18th birthday. That’s it. The way the trust works I was told it's also getting interest. My dad raised us in strict milltary style household he was a horrible father who take things to the extreme in our childhood and all of his children stopped talking to him. She is a very responsible girl for her age. The third sibling also got less because their son also owed money to my grandmother. I (f24) have 4 siblings Max(m31) Lisa(f20) Chris(m20) Emily (f18). My mom still loosing (she had it 1 year ago) my aunt had it a long time ago and never gained weight back. Since then I've been helping my mom with raising my siblings the best I can. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: Telling my parents i don’t want to be my siblings’ caretaker for the rest of my life and that might be judged because they are family I understand they are our eldest's half-siblings, but I don't feel like taking away the monetary freedom I could provide my kids just because I had to buy a bigger car and pay for two more kids. I have a 5-person family, and if my documents are to be trusted, I'm a 40-year-old man, so I've been cooking for about 25, but I learned cooking from my mom, and that means that I just can't for the life of I can't touch it until I'm 19 with the way my dad set it up. I (F17) am the oldest of 3 living with my two siblings (F14 and M10) and our mother. Husband and wife already have several kids, (I think it was 4 or 5, enough that trying to raise them as a single parent would have been difficult, and hard to find a job that will pay enough for childcare for that many kids. ATIA? When we got home later, my mom told me that I “humiliated” Cassie and that I am in the wrong. I have known Jake & Ava for only a few months as they transferred to my work location from a different one. My parents were furious with me, said I was ungrateful and that I don't love my siblings. My nephew had been playing with it nonstop since they arrived and wanted to keep it. My dad says he knows why I did and he understands. My boyfriend is moving in, my house is in a better location and is nicer, than his apartment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I told my parents that if they didn't want me to move for my new job they would have to pay me the difference between my current income and my new job. I think that's almost more annoying to me, because that's our dad. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: 1 I argued over money, even though money shouldn't be so important as to come between us 2 he doesn't have much independence and never has money, and I just feel 8. Nothing big. I was going to keep working and giving my parents the money I always do. They’ve also reached out to my aunt and cousins multiple times trying to get them to convince me to change my mind. TikTok video from ComfortLevelPodcast (@comfortlevelpodcast): “Listen to the latest podcast clip discussing the challenging situation of a parent potentially causing their child to lose their own child. Our father left when my brother was born, and afterwards we moved states closer to family for help. This would completely change the experience. They have been good friends for around 2 years now. My older sibling (28NB) didn’t see it that way. 2: My parents argue that we had a deal. However, they didn't ask for my help, they tried to steal the money I made. My biological mother was abusive and I know the difference. #aitareddit #redditstoriestok #podcastclip”. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I refused to help my family pay off my grandparents' debts, which will cause them to lose the house that's been in the family for generations. Subreddit Announcement The Asshole Universe is Expanding, Again: Introducing Another New Sister Subreddit! Follow the link above to learn more Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. Original Post - Oct 25, 2023. My health is getting better, though I have some complex and painful gut issues. I told them that I was doing this because I loved my siblings and I wanted them to be better parents for them and I had to leave for that to happen. I chose to live with my grandparents instead of my dad's wife and my siblings after we lost dad. I have asked my siblings if they could move My brother, his wife, and their almost four year old son were among the guests. I explained that I still have the money mom left me, that my grandparents also had a separate college fund for me and that my aunts and uncle (mom’s siblings) also had smaller college funds for me. My mom would beg. Her side of the story is down that vein. He’s my dad’s father, but my dad hardly had a relationship with him. . My husband never really understood, because mom’s husband was charismatic as ESH. Couldn’t pay for it because my parents assured me that they would lose the house, be destitute, not make it. I informed my father of the situation, which is causing legal repercussions for my mother concerning custody of my underage siblings. I Here’s where things get tricky: Both of my siblings are now in a financial crisis. Put your phone on silent, tell them you'll unblock them at Christmas as part of the good spirit and if My teacher knew I had a lazy streak, so she didn't believe me, even when I could remember lines from my work. PS: money is taxed and clean, and it is perfectly ok for our parents to give it My uterus has expanded to about 5 months pregnancy at my last scan in 2021. Not telling my son that his brother is autistic, which is actively causing much distress within his life and our family as a whole. My AITA for not giving her the money and causing this massive fall out with my family? Haha, no. Its also harder to lose any weight I actually had to lose because of both issues. My (28M) parents had me when they were young, and my mother died soon after my birth. I haven't visited my parents since the incident with my mom (about 3 weeks ago, and we adult kids usually visit every week if nothing comes up). So my dad and stepmom got less money than two of my dad’s siblings. Anyways I used this money to pay for my studies which I need to continue for another two years. my dad never said thank you. Sister calls me an hoe for telling the guy about the money, that I wasn't involved, etc. I'm 18F. "AITA for refusing to split my inheritance with my siblings?" I’ll try to summarize as much as possible. Idc anymore I’m in a nice routine with my daughter. My parents would just nap through the day or have to work. I'm pretty sure about 5 minutes after he officially retired he was enjoying a joint. I think this is completely fair - To this day I still don’t know what triggered this. This was also something for me and my sister, wasn't really planning on taking 3 kids on a vacation. It destroyed half my jaw. Just a switch and some games. I dropped my toxic family and got into therapy. She said she knows Cassie is frustrating but I know that’s just how my sister is and I’m supposed to ignore her. Both of them aren't neutral in judging me, obviously. My SIL left her mission early because she was having stomach problems that no one believed were real but she did in fact have some issues that needed to be treated. I can't tell how old your siblings are, and I think you at 13 now. I’ve been independent my whole life by doing odd jobs to buy my own stuff, studying my ass off and when I finally get where I am, I want to be able to spend my own money for myself. We were talking about this during dinner and my step father cuts in and says “Oh that would be a nice family holiday”. She promised my dad that she would take care of me when he's gone. My father was too emotionally unstable to parent. When my dad finally responded to my text asking if my siblings were all on a trip together I was told I was being dramatic and needed to get over it because I wouldn't have been able to afford it so they didn't invite me. Emily is disabled and because of that my parents dedicated themselves 100% to her leaving the rest of us to fend for ourselves. While my parents are able to comfortably pay for my college and maintain their life, they wouldn’t be able to do so for any of my siblings. I am working a serving job at a mid level restaurant (bills typic Yeah this was me. We KNEW we were half siblings and I think we all knew it would destroy us to say anything like that. WOW. I (30F) was appointed MOH. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! So regularly there are 6 of us - and like everyone has JOBS and money and we don’t need to all be in one house. And I like working. So I would like to know if AITA for getting involved or if I did the right thing. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I insulted my parents and siblings beliefs during a fight over something I could not control and something I felt was unfair to be held against me. AITA for not helping my siblings? Specifically my brother I guess Update: I’m offering to pay for everyone to get a vasectomy/ tubes tied this Christmas and giving my brother enough money to cover the red roof inn for a week. Since then I have been receiving message after message from my mom, my siblings and even my stepdad begging me for help. This has become an issue for I have gotten my money back 1 time (she always swears to pay me back). My mil told the entire family and ward that my SIL came home dishonorably. My aunt on my dad’s side also gave me $5k as a high school graduation gift/money for college so I should be able to complete my degree without needing to get any loans as long as "I told my siblings in the group chat that I bought the AirPod Pros and that they could each e-transfer me the money they agreed they’d give. gdgp zftlm xejewm liius hzklmqwl kgipjm gnpfu pyyiux dyn euawwdb